The world today is becoming more sophisticated by the day. The advances in technology and sciences have introduced a lot of things that contest for people’s time.
People are so busy with their phones, iPads, headphones, chatting on social media networks or trying to meet up with one deadline or the other. As a result, little or no time is given to physical interaction. However, in the heart of every individual is the desire to interact, to be loved, appreciated, respected, or simply noticed. It doesn’t matter how strong an individual might appear to be, the desire is inbuilt. In the heat of these distractions, how can one develop a likable personality? To answer this question, it is paramount to understand what personality is.
Personality describes you as a person – how you are different from other people and what patterns of behavior are typical of you. Some people are “extroverts,” for example if they are talkative and outgoing most of the time. Others are “introverts” if they are quiet and reserved most of the time. Another thing to consider is “Trait Theory”, which is defined as the terms you use to describe other people (and yourself), relatively stable personal characteristics. Trait theorists are interested in first discovering how people differ (which key traits best describe them). They then want to measure how people differ (the degree of variation in traits within the individual and among individuals).
Identifying and measuring the essential traits that distinguish individual personalities sounds much easier than it actually is. Every individual differs from others in a great number of ways. People differ from one another because of their experiences, knowledge, environment, family background, and training, and all these factors give rise to why personality is a complex phenomenon to explain. However, developing a personality that magnets people is an art that can be learned.
Firstly, developing a likable personality enjoins one to be genuinely interested in other people. When a person meets someone for the first time, he/she should take the time to introduce him/herself and ask about the well-being of the other person – business/career, family, health and aspirations, one should avoid being in a hurry. When in conversation, one should give exclusive attention, maintain eye contact and ask questions for clarity. One should never interrupt when the other person is speaking or conclude to know what they meant even before they finish speaking. Be empathetic! This doesn’t mean one becomes a shoulder that everyone can cry on but understanding that humans are emotional beings.
Therefore, when others are in pain, share it; when they are rejoicing, sincerely celebrate with them.
Secondly, to develop a likable personality, it is important to remember people’s names. When someone introduces him/herself to one, it is important that one hears the name accurately and clearly, ask for the spelling, meaning, and pronunciations. One should use the name while conversing. Since humans learn by repetition, this process will stick the name to one’s memory and will be easily recalled when the need arises. Another thing that helps in remembering names is to select a feature on the person’s face that could be easily remembered and link it to the name. When next they run into each other, the picture of that feature will pop into one’s mind and make the name easy to recall. Another way to remember people’s name is to use the image of someone bearing the same or something that one knows to link with the name. Whichever strategy that is used, the goal is to enable easy recall of acquaintances’ names. The truth is, when one meets someone the second time and is able to recall their names, they become excited and that increases their likeness for that person.
Thirdly, one should have a positive disposition about life. An individual should see the good side of everything and everyone. Be self-motivated, be enthusiastic, appreciate and compliment others. People like those who motivate them when they are depressed. Also, it is good to have a smiley face – It reduces wrinkles and it shows that one is always at peace with himself. Nobody wants to be around a grumpy person or someone that raises his/her voice at the slightest provocation.
Fourthly, one should dress gorgeously at all times. He/she should smell good, and maintain fresh breath and clean hair. This is not suggesting that one dresses like a beauty pageant. With just a few clothes, adequate maintenance, style, and creativity, people might think one operates a day cleaning services or own a boutique. One should choose fabric color that matches his/her complexion and sew style that fits his/her physique, not to jump at every new style that is trending – trends come and go.
In conclusion, developing a likable personality is not that easy; it is a life-long practice that requires consistent, persistent and deliberate effort. One must be willing to study other people, know what they want, what they like and how they want to be related to, one must be willing to sacrifice time and resources, energy and personal interest. Though easier said than done, the benefit, in the long run, is worth the effort. Moreover, if more people develop a desirable, indispensable and magnetic personality, the world will be full of peace and tranquility; therefore, let everybody embark on this worthwhile skill acquisition.
Reported by Exploits Nicholas